This is an excellent description of love. I also think that real love is unconditional. I tell my kids, "There is nothing you can do, say, or think that will make me NOT love you." There are definitely scenarios in which that can be tough. For southern white (Evangelical in particular) folks, love is very conditional. You have to look a certain way, behave a certain way, be a certain way... Part of this is their toxic church, but I also think it's partly the narcissism inherent in European culture. I think [Paul's] Christianity has helped grow this beast, and let's just say that nothing has improved it over the centuries. How does an entire culture rid itself of narcissistic thinking? To be honest, I don't think you'll find the answer at church.