You’re right. You can understand it if you lived it. Oh, sure, some friends and acquaintance will pretend to understand, while they look at you with slightly suspicious eyes, as though you can’t *really* mean all that, like maybe there’s something WRONG with you because how could anyone cut off their mother? Or fail to grieve her absence? Like, gee, if you could cut off YOUR OWN MOTHER, then you’re probably not going to be a very good friend, amiright?
My mother is mentally ill, and my father, ill in his own way, completely enables and bought into her illness. I don’t miss them. When they die, I expect to feel relief. There is nothing wrong with my feelings. There is nothing wrong with ME. This has been the truth all along.